what did i get myself into.
i lost me. who i am. i dont even know how my future is anymore. i dissappointed everyone. i just can seem to make the best of it right now. i have to think fast. its killin me. ive been making the wrong decisions. but my crowd and friends are always there. i hope things will soon be better. please forgive me. im trying i really am
The days where nothing mattered. the days that kept me smiling. the days that didnt seem so difficult. it feels like there wont ever be another day like this.
why do i make it so hard on myself? “Theres other fish in the sea.” the way i think of that is im the damn fisherman that hasnt caught any fish. why cant it be the other way around. i dont want to be caught. i want to be taken by.
No sleep.
no sleep because im hurt
no sleep because i cant seem to be happy
no sleep because i fail at everything i go for
no sleep because the paths i take are a disaster
going the right direction
i havent posted a blog in a long time.
my senses are clear and ive made my decision.
ive messed up big time and i cant come close to fucking up again.
Theirs always a point in life where something or someone can catch you off guard. i know now as long as you know your goal and you stick to your goal no matter how long it takes you, you are to accomplish it. i know now that listening is just as important as speaking. what you do now will affect the future. Most people reach their senses to “live life to the fullest” or “you only have one life to live”. I’d say think twice about your decisions because everyone grows and doesn’t get any smaller. you may not know me but coming from a lost childhood to lack of understanding there are things that i may regret that caused me into this direction. directions are everywhere. what to do, where to go, how to do, its set in everyones mind, body and soul. the basic way of life is simply in your own hands with that given direction. and that direction may be…the right direction. ;]
Friday night.
shouldve never happened. shouldve never went out to eat. shouldve stayed home. shouldve been…
